Forbidden, not Forgotten
by RoseScor90
Summary: Some relationships, no matter whether they last or not, stay forever in our hearts. So was the case with these two, even after so many years had gone by...R&R!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 12th prompt – "Meet me by the lake" for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

Hope you enjoy!

"Meet me by the lake" his voice sent shivers down her spine as he walked past her to the doors, no indication on his face that he had even noticed her; much less issued an invitation. Noone heard anything, obviously. He'd always been discrete; _they_ had always been secret, forbidden, clandestine. Nobody even suspected, even after eight months. Pansy sighed as she made a show of eating and quickly escaped out the castle doors. She didn't hesitate; she knew she'd go anyway.

When it came to Blaise Zabini, there was no way she could resist. A lost cause it was.

A/n: Review!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 11th prompt – "Toxic beauty" for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

The second drabble! Hope you enjoy!

Blaise was seated on one of the rocks jutting at the shore of the lake, the slight breeze playing havoc with his locks. He didn't notice, he was too enamored by her as she approached. People called her pug-faced, and so she was, but it suited her. She knew it only too well, and used it to her advantage often enough. He should know, he had been the most frequent victim.

_Toxic beauty_, this wasn't the first time the word crossed his mind, and it wouldn't be the last. She was the kind of girl whose mere presence would kill any other thought he might have. She demanded his full attention, and he often had to struggle to withhold atleast his sanity.

"Blaise" her breathy voice greeted him as she sat gingerly beside him on the rock and kissed his cheek.

"You're moving away" he tried to make it sound like an accusation, but his voice came out sounding gruffer than he had intended.

"That's silly, Blaise." He remained silent, staring steadily at the serene lake. Just then the Giant Squid splashed one of its tentacles, rippling the surface, like the woman beside him had disturbed his peace of mind…

A/n: Review!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 10th prompt – "Show me a little respect please, that's all I am asking," for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

The third drabble! Hope you enjoy!

Blaise looked at her with disbelief written all over his face, and Pansy sighed in resignation.

"I'm still Draco's girlfriend, Blaise" she offered as a reason eliciting a wry chuckle from him.

"Only because he is afraid of soiling his family's reputation further"

"That may be, but the fact stands. And I was taught a bit of loyalty. Do you want me to cheat on him? Your best friend?"

"What would you call us then? Don't you think eight months is too long a time to develop a conscience?"

"I'm not a slut, Blaise. You know I never sleep around, no matter what the rumors may say"

"Yes, Pansy Parkinson, a virgin. Who'd have guessed?"

"Then stop treating me like I am one. Show me a little respect please, that's all I am asking, and a bit of time"

"I don't understand why you need it, Pansy. If you're still hung up on him, may be we should stop meeting like this."

"Stop it. Stop hurting me like this. You're making me choose. I…I can't"

"I can't hang in mid air any longer, Pansy. The thread will snap sometime, and I can't give you any assurances" his tone wasn't threatening, but it carried the effect all the same.

"We know the other option then, don't we?" she hadn't meant to snap at him. But it was either him or her family honor, and she was divided right down the middle.

"Thank you, Parkinson. Hope you live a long satisfying life with Draco. Do invite me to the wedding" his voice was poison, his tone scathing. He left, but his memory was burning acid, bleaching her, washing away any doubts she might have had about her feelings.

And for the first time in her life, Pansy Parkinson cried over a guy.

A/n: Please do review!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 13th prompt – "Firewhiskey" for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

The fourth drabble! Hope you enjoy!

"Live a little Pans" the irritatingly slurred voice of Daphne Greengrass reached her over the din of the crowd in the bar, but Pansy just ignored her, opting to stare at the crowd.

"Here" Theodore Nott handed her a goblet of what suspiciously appeared to be firewhiskey. At her inquiring look, he shrugged and pointed in the opposite direction of the bar.

"Said it was on his account, for the prettiest girl in the club" he appeared as disgruntled as a messenger owl, but her eyes were trained elsewhere. The lights in the club were dim, and the charmed chandelier splashed varied colors through out the walls, giving the whole place a nauseating aura. Pansy knew she had avoided these places for a reason. And the blaring music, of which she couldn't make out a syllable, was drowning out anyone who dared to speak. It was her idea of hell on earth, not just because of the surroundings, but she knew she'd have to meet him at some point, if she were to go to these places.

She placed the glass aside, and when Nott looked at her, replied with, "I don't take drinks from strangers"

She knew it was impossible, but he looked up at her at the exact same moment, as if he had heard every single word she had spoken. What surprised her was that instead of cringing away from her hostility like a sane human, he seemed to be amused by her comment. He appeared to be contemplating something and finally shook his head before he walked out of the place. More like strutted, but she knew that was the way he always walked.

"Still hung up on him?" the startlingly loud voice awoke her from her staring and she almost flushed under the knowing stare of Astoria Malfoy. That the girl was younger than her seemed in no way to affect her ability to fluster her.

"No, no I'm not" she retorted stubbornly, turning to face the challenging expression on Astoria's face.

"Prove it"

"Give me that" with this initiative, Pansy got herself drunk for the first time in almost ten years.

The next day, Astoria had enough information to devise her master plan.

"You're upto something" Draco muttered as he glanced at her face. Clearly, the mischievous expression was a dead give-away.

"Yes, but you'll have to wait and see what I'm gonna do."

A/n: Review!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

The fifth drabble! Hope you enjoy!

The house was deserted when Pansy entered it and she looked around, trying to locate the little baby sounds she had come to associate with the manor. Ever since Scorpius had been born and Astoria had named her god mother, upsetting Daphne, she had made it a point to come by to see him as often as she could. Hearing the sound of soft footsteps and gurgling laughter, she went in that direction and sure enough there was little Scorpius, running away from his mother.

Ignoring Astoria's "Little bugger", she lifted him into her arms as he ran towards her. He giggled again and, to show that he recognized her, said, "Au' panny!" at which she couldn't help but smile. In all her life, she hadn't seen a child as adorable as Scor. Probably because he had Astoria's innocent face and Draco's charms; may just be because she was his godmother.

"What'd she do now?" she asked, holding on to him protectively.

"Wi-i-ch" at her surprised expression, Astoria explained.

"Draco called me that today. He was, uh…"

"Do I want to know?" Astoria's blush told her the answer and she turned to Scorpius.

"He's a fast learner. Aren't you, little one?" Scorpius smiled widely before wriggling away from her grasp and going to his mother.

"Where's Draco?"

"One of his friends came over and he's talking with them" she replied non chalantly and tried to get Scorpius to stay put. And watched exasperatedly as he eluded her grasp and ran away from the room. Seeing Astoria's exhausted expression, Pansy offered to get him.

"Thanks. One would think I'd get used to all this running around after three whole years, but he's just too energetic for me"

"Sit down, Astoria. I'll be back with the little devil"

"Wi-tl de-il" hearing the laughing voice, she looked at the entrance where Scorpius was stood, smirking at her. And the race began once again.

It was almost ten minutes later that Pansy came close to catching him and when she leaned to take a hold of him, she saw another arm lift him gently and heard a voice reprimand him.

"You shouldn't let people run around like that Scor. It's not nice" _his_ voice. The suave, naturally husky voice she had lost herself in all those years ago.

Even his smirk was the same, his eyes, the turbulent cobalt depths of them, still swirled with mirth and conceit. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she extended her hands to Scor who jumped into them, but not before nodding solemnly to Blaise.

"Nice to see you here Pansy, after so long" his hands were in his pockets. The perfect picture of composure, wasn't he?

"Wish I could say the same, Zabini." She turned abruptly to leave the room, but Scor was still clutching Blaise's shirt so she only ended up bringing them closer. Seeing the amusement in his eyes deepen ignited her anger.

Plucking Scorpius' palms away, she nearly ran out of the room.

A/n: Review!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 21st prompt – "Endless memories" for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 6: Midnight Musings

Pansy rolled over in the bed, trying to fall asleep; or atleast keep those darn pictures away. The past, the moments in her life, the clandestine meetings, the memories; the endless memories that had been plaguing her since afternoon. She turned to lie on one side, facing the window. But the view was incapable of helping her. No amount of staring at the room, the beautiful night sky through the window, or even the scar on her right arm could distract her from the show running in her mind.

The memories were rather pleasant, that of a happy and content couple spending time together away from prying eyes. But behind all those, like a backdrop, she could see the day, that day everything had gone wrong. She refused to close her eyes because she knew what she'd see there. His face, those impenetrable eyes shining with anger, contempt and…she sighed in pain as the last emotion ran through her mind, hurt. She had hurt him, injured his dignity, but he still hadn't forgotten her. She knew he hadn't, the years hadn't snatched her ability to read him.

With a final huff that was as much a sign of exasperation as defeat, she stood up, hurriedly tying her dressing gown around her as she walked towards the balcony. If things had gone as she had imagined, she'd now be the mistress of this huge mansion. Pansy couldn't be more grateful that it wasn't so. Opening the glass doors, she sighed in contentment as the cold draft breezed around her, calming her. The cold was good, for it erased all her other musings, drove all her weak thoughts away.

"Couldn't sleep?" that voice again, messing with her heart; those eyes, still cutting through her soul. Pansy stood frozen as she saw him walk towards her, his walk the usual strut, hands in his pockets.

Standing in the lonely balcony on a deserted part of the Malfoy Manor, Pansy could convince herself that what she was seeing was an illusion. He couldn't really be here. She had had to stay because Astoria had hurt herself and refused to go to St Mungo's. Why should _he_, when he had his own sprawling manor to get back to? So it must be one of her dreams, bringing him back to her. Anytime now, she'd open her eyes and he'd be gone; she'd wake up in her bed, alone and empty. Pansy closed her eyes and took a deep breath, preparing herself for the weariness that would engulf her once she woke up. She opened her eyes slowly, willing herself to wake up, hoping she won't.

She turned her head away so that she wouldn't have to see the empty spot where he had stood in her dreams. The moonlight shone on her face as she opened them, and he wasn't where she had seen him. He was closer, only a few feet away, the grey specks in his otherwise bottomless eyes prominent in the moonlight.

"You thought I was a hallucination, didn't you?" so his unnerving mind-reading ability was intact too, huh?

"No, I only _wished_ it was just a nightmare so I could wake up soon and things would be normal again" Normal, and empty. Void, dull. He didn't reply, only stared at her with those fathomless eyes, and she found herself drowning in them. She didn't know when he walked the distance between them, or when he took her in his arms, but when he leaned in, she jerked.

"Stay away from me" she walked back without looking at him. Running away, again.

A/n: Please do review! Is the story any good? Or should I just leave it off? Your reviews make me a better writer, so help me out?


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: Written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 23rd prompt – "**How could he(or she) ever have explained it to an outsider?**" for the Professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

Seventh chapter (no longer a drabble!) Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 7

"I don't understand what the problem is with the two of you, Pansy. I've had enough, seeing the two of you skirt around each other. I mean, I know the two of you dated during your sixth year without anyone knowing and that he broke up with you because you wouldn't break up with Draco…" Astoria did not flinch but Pansy did, as the memories of those times washed over her unawares.

"But why can't you get back together now? It's obvious that the two of you are still hung up on each other. Blaise refuses to even _try_ to act like he's interested in any other girl. And he's obviously beating himself up about hurting you."

Ignoring Pansy's derisive snort, she continued. "Why is it so difficult for you to just forgive and forget?" Astoria sat down with a steaming cup of black coffee in her hand and used it to warm her frozen hands. She had the air of a person who had made a successful point, and it annoyed the hell out of Pansy. So as she was working around the kitchen, she banged the vessels with more force than was really necessary; she did not want to talk about it with anyone, much less Astoria; the woman who claimed to be head over heels for her husband. She just wouldn't get it.

Even if she had wanted to, how could she ever have explained it to an _outsider_? Anyone except her would be unable to understand the turmoil going through inside her head. Who else would get that she was in a stitch? That she could never choose one side over the other? Or that there was _no neutral ground_ for her to walk on?

How will they ever understand that she wasn't angry with him for making her _choose_, but for leaving when she chose wrong? How will they ever comprehend that through all these years, she had held his betrayal, as she considered it, close to her heart so that she'd never make the same mistake again. How could they even know that with the right words and the right looks from him, she wouldn't hesitate a moment to slip again? Not that she was planning to; never again. She just wasn't strong enough anymore.

The silence lengthened without a reply from Pansy but she was saved from having to answer as the door opened then and Draco entered it with _him_ following, bouncing a madly giggling Scorpius around.

_He really is good at charming children_, she thought as her eyes followed his actions. _Only with her did he mess up_, she added, as his eyes suddenly turned cold and unyielding, colliding with hers across the room. She felt like she was falling, falling down into a deep abyss of blue, such a deep _blue_. She knew there was nothing at the bottom for her but anguish and sorrow, but that did not stop her from just_ falling_.

"Sure I will, Astoria" he turned his eyes abruptly to her friend and Pansy felt like she had received a blow to her stomach; as if she had had the wind knocked out of her. But of course she knew, reality had just caught up with her too fast for her to manage.

_He was leaving_. The single thought clenched her heart painfully and she quickly turned around, lest anyone notice her scrunched eyes or pained expression. She blocked out the rest of the conversation; she did not want to know of his plans. She knew _she_ had no part in them; she was a closed chapter in his life. Astoria had been wrong, he was over her.

"Could I have a word with you before I leave, Pansy?" his voice was low, soft as velvet. She could easily have acted as if she hadn't heard it if she had wanted to. But she nodded anyway, still not looking at him. She could deal with his goodbye as long as she didn't have to meet those emotionless eyes that stared at her like she was a part of the furniture.

She stood still, even when she saw his face in the water, staring at her searingly.

A/n: If you liked the story or even if you didn't please do tell me. It'll just take another moment, right?


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: written for the 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 challenge on HPFC and for January 18th prompt – "Pride" for the professor Flitwick's prompt of the day thread at HO. The stories will increase in word count from 100 – 1000 and will be a multi chap one.

The eighth installment! Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 8

"It's getting late" Blaise's voice brushed her ear. She moved away from him as far as the restricting sink would allow, but she could still feel his presence.

"I'm not blocking your way, am I?" she heard him take a deep breath and felt his hand on her shoulder. She had to move away, soon, if she wanted to have a clear head.

"Look at me, Pansy. Talk to me. Just…talk. Yell, if you want to, but don't…don't shut me off like this." She turned around, resolving to say the words that would surely make him go away. She couldn't face his eyes again, the icebergs that they would be. So she held on to whatever pride was left in her heart and asked the one question she knew would hurt him more than a thousand Crucios.

"When will you leave?" Instead of the reaction she had expected, he looked at her like she was insane. She could feel his anger boil. He'd most likely shoot something hurtful at her and walk away; she could deal with that, like she had before.

"As soon as you give me a second chance" he replied defiantly, and the answer had her anger coiling up to strike.

"Never had a choice did I? I had to choose, or you'll leave. I have to give you a chance, or you _won't_ leave. Why are you so intent on curbing my independence, Blaise? Why do you think it's bloody alright to push me into things I don't want to do?" she hadn't meant to pour her mind out like that. Just like she hadn't planned on feeling bad when he took a step back. _Oh how she had missed him_. She had to clasp her hands together, lest they reach out to stop him. He needed to let go; she needed to stop caring. _They _needed to stop existing.

"You always had a choice, Pansy. Always did" he said in that _oh so remorseful_ voice that confused her. She couldn't afford to let herself get muddled up; the result would be just another disaster.

"You have the nerve to talk like that after you…you gave me an _ultimatum_? You may not remember, but I do. It was _you_ that left"

"All I needed was for you to call me back. Just a word, Pansy. A word that I mattered to you at all, a reassurance, that I wasn't just another of your boy toys" he couldn't really mean that. He couldn't. _She_ was the insecure one, the one that had been hypnotized. Not the other way around. He never lost his head around her; he never felt like her face eclipsed the rest of the world; he definitely wasn't the one that had fallen in love with one while still dating another.

"Why couldn't you have waited just a bit longer, Blaise? Wasn't I worth that much? Were you so eager to leave me that you took the first opportunity to run away from me? Just like everyone else?" her eyes were beginning to water, that must have been the reason. That was why she was seeing that melting of his eyes.

"We both wanted things the other couldn't give, Pansy. Couldn't you accept that and move on? You can't blame everything on me forever. I did the wrong thing; you did not do the right thing. Why don't we leave it at that and start afresh?" he looked at her questioningly, but she had no more doubts in her mind. She knew this was the closest she'd get to an apology. Of course they had each done their share of wrongs, but couldn't they just push aside all that, as he had asked? Was she so surrounded by her own injured heart that she couldn't recognize another?

Her eyes were clear, as was her mind, as she snaked her arms around his torso, hugging him close. She felt him stiffen for a moment, before she was encased in a fierce hug. His lips were demanding as they met hers, but she did not mind. It had been too long. She had waited for him for _ten whole years_ and she wasn't going to give up now.

His eyes were smoldering when they met hers, and she could see the passion in her heart reflected in them and the all too familiar seductive smile appeared on his face.

"So you'll be my girlfriend, again?"

"No, you're still on probation. But may be we can go out. No hiding, though" she stated with certainty and his smile widened.

"No way am I losing the opportunity to show you off" she laughed freely this time, and she could feel the weight that had resided in her heart lift, a serene happiness filling the void.

All _was_ well.

A/n: Did the chapter move too fast? Too sudden? Is this alright? Do tell me!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Not JK…

A/n: Written for the **10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 challenge!**

Chapter 9: Every Father's Dream

"And that…is how Miss Indecision solved all her problems and had a happily ever after" little Myra finished in her childish dabble and it would have pleased Pansy to no end that her daughter was so good at story telling if it wasn't for the particular story she was telling her.

Without realizing the perilous position his life was in, Blaise entered his home, calling out to his wife and daughter. They were the only two girls in his life he genuinely liked, and the only two for whom he'd smile like an idiot, like he was now.

"Myra! Pansy! Where'd you go?" he climbed the steps quickly, going in search of them since the kitchen was empty. He stood at the entrance to the nursery, where their four year old child was seated on her mother's lap, saying something to her. But Pansy's back was to him and he couldn't discern the expression on her face, but he could guess it; adoring fascination.

That was the only expression Pansy's face held now-a-days. Blaise smiled at the thought. He'd never have thought a child would cause so much happiness. All he had imagined was crying, wailing and having to stay up at nights. But this, this miracle, he hadn't expected at all. Myra looked up from her mother's face and noticing her father, cried out

"Daddy!" she jumped up from her mother's lap and ran to him. Blaise kneeled just in time to catch her giggling form into his hands. Lifting her up with him, he walked into the room in front of Pansy.

_Uh Oh_ was the thought that ran through his mind when he faced her. She was glaring at him, though he didn't understand why. As far as he knew, he hadn't done anything to spoil her good mood and he was actually on time to take them out today.

Seeing his confusion, she looked pointedly to his side, where Myra was hanging over his arm. She was pulling at his ear, trying to get him to face her. The little bugger was too attention seeking for her own good.

"You ready to go out?" he tried the innocent way out which, apparently, was exactly the wrong thing to do.

"I'm not going anywhere until we have this cleared up. You're never telling anymore bedtime stories" she stood up slowly. She reached upto his chin, but he was the one that was intimidated. Pansy could be _very_ frightening when she wanted to.

"Hey! Why not? Myra seems to like mine better than yours. Don't you?" Myra nodded in agreement, clearly not understanding the peril she was in.

"I leave you alone with her for one night and you go and tell her your damned pathetic _life story?_" her voice was starting to shriek; never a good sign.

"Well, she wanted me to tell her an interesting story with a happily ever after and I didn't know many. I mean, I couldn't exactly tell her the story of the Dark Lord, could I?"

"No! Do you want her to become a Death Eater?"

"No! You're getting it all wrong Pansy. Come on! Cut me some slack. This was my first time as a story teller. Next time, I'll stick to Unicorns or something mundane like that. Okay?"

"But I still haven't forgiven you." With that, she took Myra from his arms and went out of the room. He followed, of course. What was the purpose of him staying in an empty room?

"Pinky!" Pansy called out and a small house elf dressed in pink popped in, awaiting orders. Pansy never ill-treated them, but she wasn't exactly warm to them either; Blaise had no problems with that.

"Take Myra to her room and take care of her until I come for her" she told the elf who obediently took the little girl and disapparated. Blaise placed half a step front but decided against it. One never knew what Pansy would do in anger.

They stood like that for a few minutes before Blaise, realizing that she was waiting for him to say something, took a few steps forward. She didn't flinch when he placed a hand on her shoulder; so Blaise guessed her temper had subsided a bit.

"You okay?" he asked in a low whisper, and she nodded mutely, sighing.

"I just…lost my temper. I'm sorry?" she turned to him with those killer eyes. How was a guy to say no?

"Why didn't you just tell her some of the normal stories?"

"Never knew them. Mum wasn't exactly the 'tucking in bed' kind of type and by the time I learned to read, I had outgrown the bed-time stories" her tried to be off-handed, but she knew him too well. She hugged him close, like she had all those years ago.

"Why were you so pissed off? It was just a story"

"I wanted to tell her, you know? When she went to Hogwarts. A memory for her to ponder"

"Sorry I spoiled it"

"Just you wait until Myra goes to Hogwarts. She'll have boys lining up for her" Pansy laughed a little sadistically at that.

"She'll be a tom boy and no one will notice her"

"Every father's dream, isn't it?" Pansy chuckled but Blaise didn't think much of it until the problem presented itself before him in the form of his _precious_ fifteen year old daughter.

A/n: Review!


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